Saturday, April 07, 2007

President Bush, me, fantasy baseball, tilting at windmills, and of course, persistence

Once the baseball season starts, my day begins with managing my fantasy baseball team. This year it is two teams. One might say I fritter away my time, which I will not argue with because I am somewhat ambiguous about the exercise.

This year I am the Commissioner of a league whose members are patrons and employees at my local bar. I also belong to a public league. Once I join a fantasy league, I remain devoted to it for the whole season. I am doing abysmally in my English Premier Football (soccer) League, but I am trying my best even though I have no chance of turning in a respectable score. That highlights one of my personality traits. I am persistent when I begin an activity or project. I am like President Bush in that regard. I suppose that is why I often display an antipathy towards President Bush because I see a lot of him in me. (Wow, I cannot believe I just said that.) Is Iraq a sort of fantasy game to the President? I wonder if historians will eventually judge it as true even though it sounds corny and bizarre to say it today.

My blog is an exercise in persistence. Many days I should let it lie dormant, but I can’t. I need to express myself to the public even though my public is smaller because of it. I wonder if I put my need ahead of the need of my readers.

I now have two MS Word blank formats that I use to write my posts. One is a 4 by 6 postcard. The other is 6 by 9 stationary. I use a script font. It makes me feel as though I am handwriting my posts as a postcard or letter to you. For some reason I need the immediacy and intimacy of doing that. That is another odd admission.

I have no idea where my life is headed, yet I feel energized over the past week in ways I never suspected. A feeling of destiny seems to lurk in the background. All I know is that I will work on my fantasy teams and writing each morning before the sun comes up. A kernel of an idea may be contained in the activity.

One of my goals this summer is to win at least one of my fantasy baseball leagues. The only question is whether fanaticism and persistence can overcome lack of brains and knowledge. That seems frivolous upon inspection. However, I suspect we all have our personal wind mills at which we tilt.


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