Certain Things: Philosophy and Sex

This is already another day of reading. For someone like me, who is not required to read professionally, reading is a self-indulgent activity. It has always been that way.

However, if I were to say, I will not indulge myself, it would be like saying, I will never have sex again. I am not ready.

I am reading Wittgenstein’s On Certainty today. The question of certainty has haunted me for several years. My opinions about many things have changed radically during that time; I search for justification.

I am struggling to prevent Wittgenstein from becoming a philosophical idol just as I am struggling to prevent a woman I know from becoming a sexual idol. Maybe, those are not proper struggles—or maybe they are foolish struggles. One needs to acquiesce at times especially when the struggle causes too much tension.

I grow old and fool myself into thinking I will quit some pursuits. I really have to stop doing that. One should read philosophy and screw for as long as one can.

I wonder if I have arrived at some certain things.